Thursday, June 14, 2007

Taking a load off. On me.

A bird took its afternoon break on me today.

That's to say, it decided the precise moment I was walking underneath it, it would unload the discarded contents of its breakfast upon my head.

It's a funny thing, having an avian dump on you. Strange thoughts pass through your head. Like, 'was that just water?'

Then, 'oh God, please let it not be bird crap'.

Swiftly followed by, 'is that liquid green...? Ahhh man, it IS bird droppings. $*&*!. Did anyone see?'

Which precedes, 'I'm in the middle of a city, at lunch-time, covered in bird poo, I really need to get to a toilet fast… wait, that's somewhat ironic… anyway, toilet, fast, clean-up… but lots of people will see me… oh no…'

Soon replaced by, 'what were the chances of me walking past at that precise moment?'

And then finally:

'Isn't this supposed to be lucky?'

Stream of consciousness is funny like that.

Which was pretty much how I approached this entry.

I've a million things floating around my head at the moment, some which I can't talk about, some which I can. For example:

- How I've managed to gain RSI in my wrist/forearm from laptop overuse (it pays not to type like you're some errant Spider-Man, legs akimbo and arms sitting through said akimbo legs).

- How I managed to stay outside my overdraft for exactly 3 weeks, before taking a total nosedive into again.

- How PayPal is quite possibly the most frustrating company ever ('please allow us to ring you up to verify your account and thus let you withdraw several weeks' worth of your wages and help out with aforementioned overdraft' *one phone call and security code input later* 'we're sorry, the phone number does not match with our database – you'll now have to wait 9 days for us to send a letter for you to do THE EXACT SAME THING YOU JUST DID').

- How my laptop started acting strangely, its backlight cutting out one night leaving me to hard reset it because I could no longer see what I was doing. I'm now faced with the quandary of choosing whether to send it off for an early case replacement (poor thing is falling apart, to be fair) and risk losing a few days of work and email contact, or keep on battling on in the hope it doesn’t clap out on me for whatever reason.


You wouldn’t believe the amount of stuff I typed and discarded for this paragraph. Prolonged rants and moans, of sorts. But it all got a bit too preachy in the end and I couldnt be bothered. I really need to talk more about my projects at hand, but there's that usual problem of it being too early or against my contracts to do so. Ack. And the artwork I have from them is sooooo good, too. Must... wait... a bit... longer...

Instead, here's a few links to recent reviews, columns and features.

New Warriors #1 Review:

Smash Bros. Brawl – Wii's Most Important Game Of 2007?:

Wii's New Best Friend - Electronic Arts:

Wii Summer Line-up: Manhunt 2, Resident Evil 4, Scarface And More:

I'm tempted to run another chapter of the Angels/Devils novel, but it may be a little too long since the last one. Will think about it over the week in the absence of anything else worth posting.

And hopefully it won't be about another of 'nature's toilet' experience.

(Clearly for the birds.)


Anonymous said...

Mmmmmmmm... you said load... huhuhuhuhuhuhu

Unknown said...

I should have known you'd like that, Schaub! ;) How long you been lurking?

Anonymous said...

You free July 6th? :)

Unknown said...

Not sure - have a b'day that may either be celebrated on that night or the weekend, so it's a bit unclear. I'll know closer to the date... What you got planned?

Anonymous said...

well how it sayz here ' shit happens' but u know in my case dat never was lucky :( booo
i have only one chapter A&Demons so if u got a while sent me the rest which u have pls. need to push it somewhere too :P ah but then i wont be anonymous :ooo
ok then try dis mail :P.
:P cheeers
ps. be careful with the birds next time!

Anonymous said...

Eerily enough, drinks for my birthday. Scarily enough, my 30th birthday. Would love for you to come, even for a little bit.

Mimey said...

lucky, without a shadow of a doubt very VERY lucky

I have experience of bird crap luck, and though I'm no expert, it's safe to insist you buy a lottery ticket before you've scraped it all off.

Unknown said...

Jemima - Too late :( I was in the middle of London, roaming at the time and didnt fancy having to walk around with bird poo on my person longer than I had to. Funnily enough, my luck seemingly has got worse since...

Steve - Didnt realise it was your b;day and you were turning 30, to boot. Wow, okay, let me know where and time and I'll do my best to come over. With any luck, the other b'day bash wont be until Sat too.

Anonymous - Well you could only be one of two people, so now I know who you are there's no need for that email addy, lol :P I may just post the chapter on here anyway, gauge a general reaction, if I can get around the logistics of it. Will see what happens tomorrow...

Anonymous said...

emailed you, you slag!